Leading from the second chair, feedback, success, and Christians quiet quitting

published12 months ago
3 min read


This past month Jim and Trisha wrapped up the series Leading Up & Out in an episode with author Mike Bonem. You can listen to that episode here.

As a reminder, the series explores how we can use influence and relationships to lead up, down, and sideways in order to shape the things we care about. If you missed the first episode in the series you can listen to it here.

Here are a few of my favorite excerpts from the series:

  • "Leadership is first and foremost, primarily about leading myself. But that has to be the starting place. And [Clay Scroggins] says, your boss is not in charge of you, you are in charge of you." – Trisha Taylor, Leading Up & Out: Part 1 (11:56)
  • "One of the most important ways to change a system is to change the way that I show up in the system. And that's work I do on my own. I mean, not, without the help of people, not without accountability from other people, but that starts with me seeing how I'm showing up, seeing what the impact of that is, and then taking responsibility for changing my behavior in all of those relationships that we're talking about." – Jim Herrington, Leading Up & Out: Part 1 (13:43)
  • "You need to be a leader and a subordinate to function well as a second chair leader, to lead well in the second chair" – Mike Bonem, Leading Up & Out: Part 2 (10:29)
  • "That tension between "if only I were in charge" and "what does it matter" is the tension that if we lose [it], things fall apart really fast." – Trisha Taylor, Leading Up & Out: Part 2 (13:00)
  • "I believe that people in the second share role should dream just as much as people in the first share role...So how do we dream? And yet. Not get so wrapped up in making my dream happen tomorrow that we lose contentment today." – Mike Bonem, Leading Up & Out: Part 2 (19:53)

That is barely a fraction of the excerpts I wanted to include in this email, but at some point, I am basically just pulling the transcript from two whole episodes. I definitely recommend going and listening to both episodes if you haven't already.

That's it for our updates today. I hope you enjoy the resources and reflections below!

Thanks for reading!

– Tim

Resources & Reflections

Are Christians Quiet Quitting?

A reflection by Trisha Taylor

Fewer people are going to church and those who do go to church go less often. Churches are having a hard time finding volunteers for their usual programs and people are saying no to leadership positions in the church. The pandemic dramatically accelerated these trends...

> Read the full reflection here: Are Christians Quiet Quitting?

Receiving and Giving Feedback

Shared by Aundrea Baker

Feedback. Just the word can raise a person’s anxiety level. Why? The simple answer is that it feels like a threat to have someone comment on one’s performance, especially if the recipient of the feedback places a high value on his or her work. On the other hand, the person delivering the feedback may not have the understanding or the skill set to deliver feedback well. The following articles by Ed Batista offer information on how to receive feedback as well as guidelines on how to deliver feedback well. Batista is an executive coach and instructor at Stanford Graduate School of Business.

> Feedback Is Not a Gift

> Giving Feedback that Sticks (pdf)

> Giving and Receiving Feedback (The Leader's Journey Podcast)

Outliers, Revisited

Shared by Tim McGee

This recent episode of Malcolm Gladwell's podcast Revisionist History titled "Outliers, Revisited" was an interesting reflection on systems, success, change management, feedback loops, and how we talk about complex problems. I recommend giving it a listen.

This is an excerpt from the episode,

I tried my best in outliers, but I subtitled the book "The Story of Success," and if I learned anything from that afternoon at Penn, it's that we want to think about success as a word to describe ourselves, our own progress, but it's not really people who are successful. It's the systems around us.

> Outliers, Revisited

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The Leader's Journey

As a team of lifelong learners, we frequently share resources with each other. This newsletter is a space for us to share some of what we are learning, thinking about, and being encouraged by with you.

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